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I've Been Keeping To Myself

by Overslept

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1.
It’s not good enough again, licking wounds and sleeping in, the past may never be mind again, but I don’t mind if you don’t mind. But It takes everything I have to keep good intentions from going bad, pacing the road less traveled alone, and contemplating on going home, but now that house is just that a familiar chill and a welcome mat, I find it harder to react when the path is gone and I cant go back. (suddenly nowhere felt like home, but suddenly I could do this on my own) I’m trying to be a coastal city, have the whole world in front of me, always home, and always on the edge of the unknown so if you’re trying to be a coastal city, come rock the boat with me, because I need it now more than I ever did before. (more than I ever did before) But a body peacefully at rest left dangerous craters in my bed and everything we never said keeps these fumes going to my head. Rumor has it that Im breaking and rumor has it that I broke, rumor has it that ill choke (what if I need you) but rumor has it wrong. (yeah rumor has it wrong) Because I, Id lift you up if that was enough. Still cold to the touch, but I, Im warming up. Im warming up. Still cold to the touch, still. I’m trying to be a coastal city, have the whole world in front of me, always home, and always on the edge of the unknown so if you’re trying to be a coastal city, come rock the boat with me, because I need it now more than I ever did before. (more than I ever did before)
2.
Looks like you were right, holding your chin up makes it easier for them to hit it, but I don’t think Ill run tonight Ill stick around so I can make them wish they didn’t. But Ive got to try, to keep it together cause I hate it here. Cause you’ve got so many words under your breath, the lack of modesty is mudding the water so dont bother making light of the weather cause you should know better. This is a catatonic social scene ironically built on reductive conversation where no one says the things they mean, so in the end nobody really ever says anything... But I’ve to try to keep it together cause I won’t stay here. Cause you’ve got so many words under your breath, the lack of modesty is mudding the water so don’t bother making light of the weather cause you should know better. Because I don’t want to know why you’d love to let it go but you’d die without your iphone because I think that we both know that your obsession goes to show you don’t know who you’d be without one... Cause you’ve got so many words under your breath, the lack of modesty is mudding the water so stop trying to look pretty and just talk to me. I thought you knew better.
3.
Shouldered 03:59
Making change from two cents and trying to live with, that the truth it the truth is inconvenient. A black sheep a black dress a red disposition, a lot of truth so either way ill keep what I’m gleaning and keep believing... That I could quit you if I need to but the cold kills you quicker than the cigarettes do so stop looking at me in a way that would make your mother worry and do something that’ll make your mother worry because I want to want you I just never want to need you. I want to want you I just never want to need you. These chemicals and criminal but I think ill allow it because they find my blood in all of this caffeine. I wonder If she can tell that It means something to me, that her sober thoughts and idle hands are know wondering on me. That I could quit you if I need to but the cold kills you quicker than the cigarettes do so stop looking at me in a way that would make your mother worry and do something that’ll make your mother worry because I want to want you I just never want to need you. I want to want you I just never want to need you. But I guess I’m still deciding what kind of man I am, because I don’t know why I came here but I came anyway... I would never ask you, to put the changes back on cause I would never want to get to know any other version of you than the one thats familiar with owing nothing to no one. So dwell where its warm enough and if I’m not warm enough that I will quite you if you need me too.
4.
Its to familiar the way evening cramps the space inside my head. Left boiling over sleeping next to things I should have said, because you can lend perspective but we both know that I can not be gifted. So cross your fingers that the things you want and things you needed, are the same now. Ill keep adjusting proximities in an attempt to relate. To these misadventures that have me hating everything. You should stop saying you miss me cause I struggle to authenticate the curves on your canvas as symmetry or wasted space it feels the same as... But there’s something so loud about this quite south side apartment because Ive yet to give the walls something to talk about. So as of right now Im acknowledging apprehension as a natural mechanism of my fickle mind. But its too peculiar the way it finds me almost every time. Sitting in the sunlight even when I’ve locked the doors and drawn the blinds. Because Ive been trying to grow out of you, but what once bloomed died and made the soil. A hostile foreign body policy and ugly feelings towards these pretty things has left me alone now. Ill keep adjusting proximities in an attempt to relate. To these misadventures that have me hating everything. You should stop saying you miss me cause I struggle to authenticate the curves on your canvas as symmetry or wasted space it feels the same as the silence. But there’s something so loud about the way you let me down, because I don’t think this will be something we’ll laugh about. So as of right now, I guess that I am just deciding that this will be the beginning of my fearless life, but I miss you all the time. Go alone you know that you have to.
5.
She’s like come on man you’re being such a buzz kill cause you know that it’s easier than you’d think to loose yourself in all of these cheap drinks. She’s like come on man what did you say that for because you know no one cares about what you think just speak enough so think you’re listening. But Im the one who needs to get my act together, ain’t got enough debt yet to consider myself a winner. But she’s double majoring in chain smoking and loitering. With a minor studies in spending all of her parents money. Trying to be the M.V.P. of tonsil hockey. But she’s like come on man what did you were that for because you should know pigs eat first with there eyes so make sure what you sell is what is advertised. But honestly love what would we break bread for cause I can see you choking on you’re pride and honey we both know you’ll never swallow. But she’s double majoring in chain smoking and loitering. With a minor studies in spending all of her parents money. Trying to be the M.V.P. of tonsil hockey. Deep down you know what you are an imitation of a work of art. Getting high off of any guy who talks to you like misogyny taught him to.
6.
No Kings 03:31
Up to my chin in wasted youth, from breaking bread with the likes of you. I cant replace what they took from you, but we can take whats left and make something new. But what do you want me to do, have two and a half kids and white suburban walls to put my head through because complacency looks so much worse on me than in does on you. Its such a shame they’ll say he got in his own way. Its such a shame he paid for mistakes with an interest rate. The suns kissing your cheek like its sweet on you but the things that you’ve done are bleeding through. Urban royalty looks down on you but they’re the kings and queens of nothing new. So what do you want me to do, have two and a half kids and white suburban walls to put my head through because complacency looks so much worse on me than in does on you. Because in shallow waters bodies lie. You wont swim and I know why. Because when fiction bends the will of men, they’re never the same again. They’re never the same again.
7.
I find you disingenuous like the house that I grew up in, aesthetics always shifting but the frame remains unchanging. Nothing short of demolition would rob you of your function to exist in conjunction with the evil that dwells outside the walls. But all I ever hear when you’re near, is a tiny violin playing you in, the cadence of your self confidence down tuned to something subordinate. But steady hands can still draw the shortest straw. But all our conversations are like fists hitting the pavement despite your knuckles conviction the cement remains indifferent. Lost in neighborhoods I grew up in, where form does not fit function and there’s nothing triumphant about the mansions rich men live alone in. But all I ever hear when you’re near, is a tiny violin playing you in, the cadence of your self confidence down tuned to something subordinate. But steady hands can still draw the shortest straw.
8.
I’ve been awake for a while studying the ceiling tiles because I know they know about me. Cold feet in the hall and words scribbled on the wall but they lack the legibility to mean a god damn thing to me. It’s not much but it’s all I have; dancing to the rhythm of a world gone mad cause you said I was always no good, you said I was always no good. I’ve been spinning for a while on a cerebral turnstile that’s convinced me Im forgettable because the way you left the room left no room to assume that you where ever coming back again or that you’d ever want to. It’s not much but it’s all I have; dancing to the rhythm of a world gone mad cause you said I was always no good, you said I was always no good. Is this really how it ends? We just never speak again? Become voices in the wind can we keep this to ourselves, because you know i’d let you in if you found my door again but I know I don’t deserve to be much more than a dead man. For so long you were all I had, the only thing good in a world gone bad. So If it makes you feel better to believe I hurt you on purpose than I have no issue pretending I deserve this.
9.
Lit cigarette leather jacket wild eyes and knee highs maybe I should stop avoiding your eye contact. I should have told you that you were beautiful standing there in your rained out cloths like the Pacific Northwest knows something I don’t. But I had all of Salt Lake City to romanticize this to convince myself that I could be, someone you could miss. Pushing spring in early November Im not thinking through this, but what if luck could be a lady... And maybe I’ve just never met her. Because there might be one good thing about this side of the country and she just so happens to be light years out of my league. A point of contention serves as the center for the spinning thread Ill use to rap my head around this I promise that I meant nothing by it, making it increasingly harder to deny it. I should have told you it was meaningful the way you made me feel completely unhelpful a shy reminder that there’s still something moving behind my rib bones. But I’ve got a long midwest winter to forget about this. Ive got to get in the ring before I swing and hope that I don’t miss. Millions in five dollar words but you’re, you’re not buying it yeah I think that luck could be a lady. And maybe I’ve just never met her. Because there might be one good thing about this side of the country and she just so happens to be light years out of my league. Miles out of my reach.

credits

released December 11, 2015

Elias Armao // Vocals, Guitar, Drums
Chloe Armao // Vocals (Shouldered)
Sydney Clapp // Vocals (Almost All The Time)
Henry Hopp // Auxiliary drums, Gang Vocals
Sanjay Pawar // Gang Vocals
Mickey Postilion // Vocals, Guitars
Ben Socolofsky // Gang Vocals
Evan Zeller // Bass

Written and recorded by Overslept
Mixed by Mickey Postilion
Mastered By Corban Roberts at Tessitura Studios

Overslept 2015

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Overslept Denver, Colorado

Indie rock with sensitive breakdowns.

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